Can't reach orgasm (male)
Hi, I've a question about male orgasm. When I'm having sex with my girlfriend I find it difficult to get to orgasm. She says I last too long. I'm 18. Can you help?? Thanks.
Well you you have the opposite problem to most guys! Although male anorgasmia, or not being able to reach orgasm, is still quite common. I presume you can reach orgasm through masturbation. If you cannot orgasm at all then see a doctor asap.
If the problem only occurs when you have sex, then there's a few things to try. Basically whot you want to do is reverse all the advice given in the orgasm control section. Here's some tips:
- Position. The missionary is your best bet, or any position where you are on top. Being on top (for women or men) generally increases raw physical sex pleasure.
- DEEP penetration and long strokes. The best position for this is the missionary. You're on top, both facing each other. Put a pillow or two under her hips. Now lift her legs up. This will give you deeper penetration and more stimulation. Hook your arms under her knees. Alternatively, stay in the missionary but rest your bodyweight on her and put both your hands on her bum while you have sex. This should increase pleasure for you.
- Try squeezing muscles in your bum, legs and thighs. This usually increases pleasure and sensation.
- Fantasise. If you have some sex fantasies, no matter how bizarre or crazy, close your eyes and fantasise about them during sex.
Having said all of that, you first priority must be your girlfriend's pleasure. If you're taking too long to get to orgasm and she is unhappy with sex then you must stop. Attend to her pleasure first. Use g spot massage and clit sex techniques.
If you have intercourse sex for too long without keeping her interested, this will reduce blood flow to her vagina / clitoral area and she'll produce less lubrication. This could lead to dryness which leads to irritation and possibly small abrasions inside the vagina. Once you get this its bye bye sex for a day or two, depending on severity. So LUBRICATION is what you want and lots of it. Buy water based lubricant in any pharmacy / drugstore / chemist and use it, especially if you use condoms.
Alright, I have that same problem.. Now the way around it is, don't think so negatively.. Think about it this way, you're having sex to please her, then yourself.
After you've pleased her, start flexing your pc muscles, start breathing fast, and close your eyes. I guarantee you'll reach an orgasm in less than 10 minutes..
I went on for 2 hours without climaxing once. It was the crappyest feeling.
-Stephen
I also have the same problem and Im 16 I know Im young but please don't descriminate because of age. I know how you feel about the two hour timeing Stephan but I really don't see why I have this problem I masturbate once a week really, but I may just try some of the steps listed at the top. Thanks for listing them I have a basic high school education and in the 3 years I've been at my school I've never had sex Ed so I don't know alot but again thank you.
Her pheromones may be telling you that you are genetically incompatible. try another female.
Are you kidding? You don't try someone else because of a problem you are having. If your partner loves you then they will work with you to solve it. If the partner does nothing but berate you and doesn't want to swolve the problem, then you have bigger issues, but right now this is solvable.
IM 19 and when im having sex, half way in my dick starts softening up and when i get it excited again and start fucking i can't cum. what the hell do i do? is it fatigue cuz im generally pretty tired.
If you masturbate alot, don't. If you have sex alot then try to cut back. Do romantic things to keep her mind busy, while you rest. If you have sex or masturbate alot it makes your body more strong against having an orgasm. However, if you stress out about having an orgasm or anything else that may cause stress in your life, it can cause you to not reach orgasm's.